House divided on dividing immigrants

After the Senate passed its watered-down (some would call it beefed-up) version of immigration reform, House Speaker John Boehner (R-OH) quickly announced that his chamber would never vote on it.

No surprise there. After all, this is the post-2010, Tea Party-pinned House of Representatives we’re talking about. It’s unlikely any immigration bill could pass the House at this point, unless it’s to put Mitt Romney’s (remember him?) self-deportation policy into immediate effect.

Fortunately, there’s a glimmer of hope.

Majority Leader Eric Cantor (R-VA) and Judiciary Committee Chairman Bob Goodlatte (R-VA) are working on the House Republicans’ version of the DREAM Act, currently known as “kids first.” Basically, only those undocumented immigrants brought to the country as children would be eligible for legal status.

Sure, such a bill would fail to address all of the 11 million undocumented immigrants in the United States today, but at least it’s a start. At least the House Republicans are even considering legalization for a portion of America’s undocumented.

Still, the sun will freeze solid before Boehner’s boys agree on anything.

Former Pres. George W. Bush tried to push his fellow Republicans in the positive direction when he spoke at a naturalization ceremony at his presidential center in Texas. Responding to Bush’s call to keep America “a welcoming society,” Rep. Tim Huelskamp (R-KS) said, “We care what people back home say, not what some former president says.”

And even if you are expecting the House to pass an immigration reform bill, I’d advise you to look for something to do while you wait. Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) told reporters he’d be surprised if anything happened before the August recess, and Rep. John Fleming (R-LA) simply said, “I don’t sense any urgency.”

So wake me up when August ends.

[Browse through the Courage Campaign’s collection of “Shit Republicans Say About Immigrants”]

 

How many Latinos does it take to sue Target?

Three former employees are suing Target for discrimination over a memo distributed to warehouse managers that contained a ridiculous set of “multi-cultural tips.”

The tips for interacting and understanding Latinos are as follows:

a. Food: not everyone eats tacos and burritos;
b. Music: not everyone dances to salsa;
c. Dress: not everyone wears a sombrero;
d. Mexicans (lower education level, some may be undocumented);
e. Cubans (Political refugees, legal status, higher education level); and
f. They may say ‘OK, OK’ and pretend to understand, when they do not, just to save face.

Letters d. and e. are clearly ignorant and offensive. But, personally, I think a. through c. are important reminders for non-Latinos and f. is flat-out hilarious — kind of like a Latino version of “white people do this, black people do that.”

Of course, comedic ethnic observations have no place in a human resources memo, but it’s still funny. Right?

OK, OK. It’s not funny at all.

 

Salma Hayek is international

Finally, Mexico is up in arms, not over the drug-war killings or the suckiness of the Mexican soccer team. No, the Mexican media is attacking Salma Hayek for her singing of “The Star-Spangled Banner” and her failure to recite the lyrics to “Mexicanos, al grito de guerra.”

As HuffPo points out, this is not the first time Salma has sparked controversy for not thumping her chest hard enough for her patria.

She downplayed her Mexican-ness during an interview with the German edition of Vogue, saying, “Honestly, I hardly had any memories of what it is to be Mexican. My life is completely different now.” Born and raised in Veracruz, Salma is now a U.S. citizen living with her billionaire French husband in Paris.

To be fair, after viewing the entire interview with Letterman wherein she sings the two anthems, I think it’s pretty clear Salma is a proud mexicana-estadounidense. She doesn’t fumble through Himno Nacional Mexicano. She only seems unsure if Letterman wants her to actually sing the whole thing.

Salma also does something dangerous for any Mexican-American celebrity to do in front of an American crowd by suggesting that the Mexican flag is more beautiful (“more elaborate”) than the American flag. And when Letterman asks why the Spanish anthem talks about war, she fires back that the American anthem is “a little bloody,” too.

The interview ends with Salma singing “The Star-Spangled Banner” as she stands, hand over her heart, in front of a large American flag. It’s a fitting tribute and a fitting end, coming from a Mexican-born woman who just talked about becoming a U.S. citizen, marrying a French billionaire and living in Paris with her trilingual, multicultural American daughter.

Only in America.

 

[Photo: CBS via Huffington Post]

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